1) When you asked me the cost of staying an extra night, I quoted you the price for the two sea-view rooms you’re staying in. The “cheaper” online price you saw was for a different room type. One with no view. Capisci?
2) Okay, against my advice, you booked online. You just booked two different room types (one double occupancy, one single occupancy [?]) at two different rates. No, you cannot stay in your sea-view suites for that price. Because I said so, that’s why.
3) The credit card you submitted through Booking.com was declined. No, you did not already pay Booking.com. Let me explain how this works. Why would I lie to you? All of your dumb questions are being recorded by this security camera.
4) Okay, fine. Go check your credit card statement and verify that Booking.com didn’t already take payment. You can bring your CC down in the morning to run in-person, right before I move you into the shittiest pair of double occupancy rooms I have.
Why? Because you, you’re the worst.
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